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I'm not quite sure what to put here. Maybe some Quotes & Fat Mama jokes. What do you think?

"I am only prejudice against people that I decide are stupid"-Reagan Nickels
 
The Dumb Ass Bass- I love this thing! It cracks me up everytime.
 
The Many Operations Impossible
by
Special Agent Bebe
&
Special Agent Jeje
 
Clark County Aquatics..Watch out!
 
Operation Leonardo
-Foam up down the slide -Check-
-Foam up in the pumps -Check-
Mission Completed
 
Operation Masterpeice
-50 dead fish in the deep end of the pool -Check-
-Laundry & Dishwashing detergent in pumps -Check-
-Chunky soup that looks like throw up -Check-
-Eggs..-Check-
Mission Completed
 
Your Momma Jokes
Yo mama's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she looks at the menu, and says, "Okay".
 
Yo mama's so stupid, she tripped over a cordless phone.
 
Yo mama's so stupid she got stabbed in a shootout.
 
Yo mama's so smelly, she has to use Right Guard and Left Guard.
 
Yo mama's so fat, she's got more rolls than a bakery.
 
Yo mama's so fat, I ran around her twice, and got lost.
 
Yo mama's so fat, that when she was walking on the beach, allt he whales jumped out of the ocean singing "We Are Family"
 
Yo mama's so smelly, when you were being delivered, the doctor was wearing the oxygen mask.
 
Yo mama's so stupid, she gave birth to you.
 
Yo mama's so smelly, she made Right Guard go left, Speed Stick slowdown, and Ban come off strike.
 
Yo mama's so smelly, her Sure deodorant is confused and her Secret deodorant told on her.
 
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a spoon to the Super Bowl.
 
Yo mama's so stupid, that under "Education" on her job application, she put "Hooked on Phonics".
 
Yo mama's so fat, when she bends over, we go into daylight savings time.
 
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on my cat's tail, now I call him"Beaver".
 
Yo mama's so fat, she's got more chins than a Chinese phone book.
 
Yo mama's so stupid, she spent twenty minutes lookin' at an orangejuice box because it said concentrate.
 
Yo mama's such a drunk, if it wasn't for the olives in the martinies she would starve to death.
 
Yo mama's so stupid, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
 
Yo mama's so smelly, even dogs won't sniff her crotch.
 
Yo mama's so fat, at the zoo, elephants started throwing her peanuts.
 
Yo mama's so stupid, she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

Quotes
 
Catch My Tuna? (My own quote, means Catch my drift..)
 
The Hardest Thing to do in this world is to live in it. ~Buffy (The Gift)
 
I have PMS & a Gun. Now excuse me, did you have something to say?
 
Never insult stupid people in large groups.
 
You stupid pig-dogs! Your mother was a hamster & your father smelt of elderberries! Now leave before I taunt you a second time!
 
The Knights Who Say Nee demand a sacrifice! You shall bring us a SHRUBBERY!...You shall bring us another shrubbery! One slightly bigger with a little path through it. Then, you shall find the biggest tree in the forest & cut it down WITH..A HERRING!
 
Come & see the violence in the system! Help Help I'm being Repressed!
 
Run Away! Run Away! ~Monty Python's Holy Grail
 
HEY YOU GUYS!! ~The Goonies
 
"What can I say? I've always been bad.."-Spike
 
"Around here, we put the FUN in dysFUNctional."
 
"The only thing standing between me and total happiness is reality."-Douglas Porter
 
"The first cut is the deepest..The first cut is the deepest. When it comes to being lucky he's cursed. When it comes to loving me, He's worse"-Sheryl Crow
 
"Out! Out damn spot!"-Lady Macbeth [Macbeth]
 
"Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise..surprise and fear..fear and surprise..our two weapons are fear and surprise and ruthless efficiency. Our THREE weapons are fear and surprise and ruthless efficiency and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope...Our FOUR..no..amongst our weapons..amongst our weaponry are such elements as fear, surprise..I'll come in again..."-Monty Python
 
"Help! Help! I'm being repressed!"-Monty Python's Holy Grail
 
"He has his goodness now. God forbid I should take it from him."-Goody Proctor [The Crucible]
 
"There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and statistics."-Benjamin Disraeli
 
"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."-Mark Twain
 
"Blessed is he who has learned to admire but not envy, to follow but not imitate, to praise but not flatter, and to lead but not manipulate."-William Arthur Ward
 
"He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away"-Raymond Hull
 
"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked."-Bernard Meltzer
 
"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget."-G. Randolf
 
"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."-Walter Winchell
 
"When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us."-Alexander Graham Bell

"To the world you may be just somebody, but to somebody you may just be the world."
 
"Sometimes, the love we are looking for is right in front of us - too close for the eyes to see. So, close your eyes and let your heart see for itself"
 
"No man is worth your tears, and the one that is, won't make you cry."
 
"When you like someone, put their name in a circle, not a heart, cause hearts can be broken, but circles go on forever."
 
"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
 
"A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous"
 
"Developing a new emotion of love for someone is easy...the hard part is getting rid of the old emotion you had for someone else."
 
"Better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all."-St. Augustine
 
 

Have any jokes? Send them to me & I will put it up. I love anything, Blond Jokes & all that crap so send them.
 
 

Immature & Loving it...